Always Half A Step Behind || One-Shot
Feb 27, 2017 13:03:07 GMT -7
Rebecca and Phoenix Ezra like this
Post by Pyra Elswood on Feb 27, 2017 13:03:07 GMT -7
time turn back your hands
don't let this be
the way it ends
The blonde victor dreaded going back to District 4. After she had lost Finnick, slept with thirteen men, and drank all of her problems away, she was finally ready to face her problems. She was ready to face Adam. Pyra didn't want to hurt him--that was the last thing she wanted to do. She loved him, but she needed to be free of her guilt. She was done hurting people, and the only way she could be free from that pain was to let him go. She hated herself right now, but once she talked with her fiancée, she was ready to be better. She wanted to be a better person, a better sister, and a better protector. She needed to not only do this for herself, but for the people around her.
As she rode the train back, she held the diamond fishhook necklace in her hands. She had kept it all that time in the Capitol in her wallet. It was an awful thing to do, to cheat on the man you love, but she did it more out of her own anger and confusion rather than hurt. Still, she wouldn’t take this lightly. Pyra had to break up with him for his family’s own safety and her sanity.
When she entered District 4, she was shaking nervously. She didn't want to do this and it was really the last thing she wanted to do. Pyra would honestly rather have Adam hate her than be hurt by her though. She stepped off of the platform, remembering what happened at this spot only ten days ago. Ms. Pontifex yelling, the sirens ringing, the rush of trying to get to Finnick on time--it was all for nothing. It was her fault. She looked down, trying to pass the station in a hurry.
All she wanted to do was go home. The late afternoon day reflected with men and women trying to make their way home. Pyra kept her head held high. The faces that passed her showed emotion towards the Elswood girl. They looked at her with pity. She was confused as to why they were like that. Had they still been sad about the games? Did they know about her binge drinking in the Capitol? Or had they known something she didn't. She knew it couldn't be the latter.
Pyra entered her home. She wanted to go there first and greet her family so they wouldn’t worry about her. Her father was waiting for her in the living room right when she walked in. He stood up when she closed the door behind her. "Pyra, are you alright?" He asked, looking at her. She raised an eyebrow. Had word already gotten out that she drank a lot in the Capitol or that she slept with several men? As ashamed as she was of those things, Pyra really didn't know what he was talking about. "Yeah, I'm fine. What's going on?" She said, not in a mean way, but more in a curious way. This was the last thing she needed. Her father was going to give her a lecture on how she shouldn't drink and do drugs. His face broke into sorrow. He knew that she and Finnick had been sort-of friends, so she wondered if that was it.
Her father then walked over to hug her. "Pyra, I am so sorry," he said. Was her mother okay? Had Breckon gotten hurt? She hugged her father back, unable to remember the last time she had hugged the man she looked up to. This was something deeper than her just drinking and doing morphling in the Capitol. Her body shook even more that it did when she was nervous about breaking things off with Adam. She was so tired of hearing bad news, but she hoped the news wasn't too bad. If it was about her mother, she would understand. She had been a vegetable since she was eight. "Dad, what's wrong? Is mom okay?" She said seriously, unable to comprehend what was going on. She was extremely worried now. Erik Elswood stepped back, looking at her and nodding. He then took a deep breath, seeing that he was on the verge of tears himself.
"Adam and his mother are dead."
Her jaw dropped immediately and her breath stopped. He had said something about the uprising and them getting shot, but she didn't pay attention to the rest. Adam had been dead the whole time since she was gone. She had slept with those men, trying to make Adam break up with her, and having her engagement necklace with her the whole time, but he would never know. She wasn't there for him when she needed to be. If she was there, she could've stopped it. She could've done something! Pyra couldn't handle it. She immediately walked out of the home. She had to know for herself.
No, this was a joke. This couldn't happen. So many people had already died because of her. This wasn't real. Her father was lying. She made up excuse after excuse. Pyra walked to the home next to hers. It was completely dark. She tried to open the door, but it was locked. "NO!" She screamed, her hands turning into fists. She banged on the door, trying to get in. There was nothing. No answer, no sound. The only sound that lurked in the area was the echo of her voice and the ocean wind blowing through her ears.
She sank to the ground. She needed to catch her breath. This wasn't real. This couldn't happen. Pyra needed to breath but she couldn't. Pyra knew that she would be the only one who cared and who knew what happened in the last ten days. She couldn't bring herself to her feet. It didn't matter who she loved, they would all end up dead anyways. Breathe. Everything she had done in the past year was a mistake. She had made all the wrong choices. Her mistakes had costed her greatly. Maybe if she wouldn't have gone into the games Quirinus would've won. Maybe if she hadn't walked out three nights after the games Finnick wouldn't have been taken away. Maybe if she was here for Adam instead of betraying someone who was dead, he would've been alive. And yet somehow she was still alive. Pyra could've died in all of those circumstances, but because of the people in her life, she was alive and so was her family. She couldn't take any other risks. She couldn't go back to her home. One misstep, one wrong move, and they would die too.
The one thing that made her feel awful was that she couldn't make it to their funeral. Nobody told her, nobody said a word when she was in the Capitol. She didn't even know if they had a funeral. She loved Adam. He was the reason she won the games--through his training and strength. He was the reason she kept pushing through in the games. He was the reason she kept on living. And Pyra stomped on his grave by cheating on him and trying to push him away. She grasped the necklace in her hand. She had to take a moment to breath. She needed to stop and think. What would Adam do in this situation? Probably drink, but she had to do something more progressive. The Elswood girl had an idea.
She needed to get up. The train was probably still there. Adam was dead and so was Quirinus, but maybe she could still do something about Finnick. She didn't care what happened to her. President Snow might be able to help her. Even if she could just get Finnick released in exchange for her death, it would be something worth fighting for. She had to see him. "I'm so sorry Adam," she whispered. Her face was soaking wet, though she hadn't even noticed that she was crying. She needed to go. This might be the last time that she could do something good in her life.
Pyra turned around and got off of her feet, sprinting towards the train station with the necklace in her hand. She had to get to the train before it left. Every step she took, she saw all of the faces that suffered because of her. Jade. Alexa. Jay. Iuta. Veya. Fable. Quirinus. Finnick. Several unnamed rebels. Adam. Her kill count was probably larger than any Peacekeeper, whether intentional or unintentional. Jade should've had a better chance. Jay should've left. Iuta and Veya should've ran away. Fable needed to be stronger. Quirinus shouldn't have gotten so attached. Finnick should confide in someone better. The several rebels should've found someone else to trust. Adam shouldn't have been on the beach that night. There were so many factors, so many ways she could've saved these people. If she was just out of the picture, they all would've lived.
She could see the train in her eyesight. It was still there. A Peacekeeper noticed her and the other one turned around. Tears flung off of her face as she sprinted towards the train. When Pyra was finally there, she looked at the Peacekeepers and took her breath. "I need to speak to President Snow. Please, it's an emergency. He'll want to see me," she said. "I'll just be in the Capitol for a couple hours. It won't take long." Two victor had met their fate on the same day and one might be alive if he was lucky enough. She needed to do something. Both of the men she loved were dead, so maybe she could save someone who didn't deserve any of this.
The Peacekeepers looked at each other and nodded. "We'll radio the Capitol and tell him that you're coming," one of the Peacekeepers said. It was a man, and it had also been the first time she heard a Peacekeeper speak. She let out a breath. "Thank you so much." She said with sincerity. The doors to the train opened and she walked into it. President Snow terrified her, but maybe he would understand. He would have to understand if Pyra were to be at peace. She was doing this for Adam, for Quirinus, and for all of the others that had suffered at her fate. If she could save just one person, she could finally be okay with herself. Finnick was the only one who mattered now, and she would do whatever it took to get him out of the Capitol, even if she had to trade her own life.
WORD COUNT: 1802
NOTES: Sorry I keep making Pyra posts. Things just keep happening that she needs to react to lol